The Weather In Boston

I think the weather in pretty much the whole of New England has been Father Winter's idea of a joke...except it ain't that funny. I bet he's sitting up there, rubbing his palms and ho-ho-hoing like santa claus at his own handiwork. Well, laugh it up, jackass...you'll get yours someday.

For those of you aren't in the know, here are the sequence of events that happened a few days ago. Look at them, and I think you'll agree that they can't be anything other than an evil, malicious and highly irritating plan.

First...: it snows all damn day...and I'm talking like 6-8 inches here. I see snowplows running around the city like crazed banshees trying to get the damn stuff off the road. Of course, in doing so, they turn all sidewalks into mini-replicas of Mount Washington

Then...: the snow turns into rain. A good thing? The temperature's going up you say? Well yeah, except you're forgetting that there's six inches of snow on the ground already. Result? Rain and snow have a little rendezvous together, getting all nicely mixed up and turning into...slush.

Finally...: and this one's a riot, folks...when the snow and rain combo could not be any messier, the temperature suddenly plummets like a plane out of fuel, dropping into sub-sub-zero regions. The whole city freezes over! All that slush turns into ice! You see? You see??? How can that not be a plan??

Anyway, the whole of New England is a huge ice pond. Hell, you could skate to work if you were crazy enough to. Maybe it'll stay this way a little longer and we can host the next ice olympics in boston...in the middle of the frocking street.

Hehe...I'm not as mad as I make it sound...it's not that bad actually. Honestly.

Except it is. *Shakes fist at Father Winter, making a silent wish that his beard gets caught in a lawnmower*